"I Never Finish Anything", or so you think…

There are different reasons why you start things but never finish them. One of them is that you find out that the thing you started really isn’t for you, so it gets ‘abandoned’. The other is that some old story shows up that says you aren’t ‘allowed’, ‘good enough’, or ‘capable’.

Both of these can cause feelings of inadequacy or worthlessness and continuing stories of, “I never finish anything” or “This is another one of those things that will never get done.”

Let’s dive into what really happens…

“I Never Finish Anything” Might Not Be the Truth

When you get a spark of inspiration and you set off on a new project adventure, there is something exciting about what you’re doing. This thing calls to you because it touches a need, want, or desire within.

As you delve into this adventure you may find that what surrounds that key excitement (the need, want, or desire) doesn’t mesh well with where you want to go. The people may not be the right people. The direction may not be the right way for you. Or, you may just find out that what it takes to do that thing is really not your cup of tea and out of alignment with who you are and want to be.

But, you’ve said you’re going to “do this thing!” so you stick it out and try to finish it, but each day becomes more of a slog than the last. So you finally stop, but you never really acknowledge that you stopped because it wasn’t for you.

The loop remains open and it feels like a failure. The people around you start saying things like, “You never finish what you start” or “Here we go again with another one of those projects/ideas that will never go anywhere.” Then you start to take on these stories as if they are truth.

The feeling that you just abandon things and never finish them creates shame and guilt. Guilt over time, money, or energy spent with “no real return.”

One way to help yourself shift this perspective is to acknowledge that, whilst there was something there initially, what surrounded it was misaligned for you and instead of going against your own personal grain, you made the decision to find that initial spark in something more aligned and attuned to your energy and path.

This is actually a good thing because you’ve found out what DOESN’T work for you and you can use that information going forward. It’s a part of your learning journey.

Sometimes You Don’t Finish Because Something Interrupts the Flow

Then there is the situation in which you dive into something and it is all wonderful! You’re getting things completed, learning fabulous information, and getting closer to the end result you wanted in the first place. And then it seems like you just stop.

This could be for a number of reasons. Some emergency happened to pull you away and the project drifted. Something showed up and your emotional state kept you from moving forward. You got close to something amazing and old safety protocols reared up and stopped you dead in your tracks.

Most of these things could be just a pause in the project, but it’s what you do (or don’t do) after them that stops the underlying flow.

I’ve had quite a few of these moments in my life where things just stopped and I never returned to them. And then there are those few projects in my life that I have pushed through those moments, gotten the help I needed, or simply returned back to the project after the stop and continued on from where I got diverted. (There are definitely more of the former hehe)

Some were family emergencies that needed attention and took days, months, or years in some cases to handle and complete. And some were/are emotional blocks that I need(ed) to work through in therapy.

Each one is an opportunity to look at what it is that excites you about the project. What is that spark, that idea, which builds up the energy to continue working and moving forward?

Knowing your “why” really helps you to come back to the thing you really want to do, no matter how many times you might get diverted. You learn what doesn’t work, you learn what does, and you keep choosing that spark and coming back day after day, year after year, decade after decade.

Why It Feels Like You Never Finish Anything, And What It’s Showing You

And if you feel like you’ve just been wandering around and nothing feels like it’s been cohesive, I invite you to look back and see all those projects or ideas that fell by the wayside. What did they have in common? What are the stories around them? Where is the shame or guilt landing?

You might be able to see a pattern within all the divergent paths you’ve taken in life. Use that to show yourself how it all connects and that you haven’t really ‘abandoned’ anything and that there is no shame or guilt required when you are learning and discovering. You are on the path, right where you are supposed to be, and each point of diversion, rest, or blockage is there so that you can become more capable and stronger in order to reach your BIG Dream.

If this is hitting a little close to home, good. That means you’re paying attention. The projects you started, the ones you walked away from, the ones that still tug at you, they’re not random. They’re clues. Little breadcrumbs pointing you back to what actually matters to you.

So instead of trying to force yourself to “finish better,” what if you got curious instead?

What if you started to understand the stories underneath those starts and stops, so you can move forward with clarity instead of guilt?

That’s exactly what I walk you through in my Find Your Stories guide. It will help you uncover the patterns behind your choices, so you can see what’s been guiding you all along, and use it to move forward with confidence and direction.

Because you’re not someone who never finishes, you’re someone who’s been taking the time to gather the pieces of your BIG Dream.