Reinvent Yourself After Life Transitions
After a major life transition, it’s common to feel like you’ve lost sight of your purpose. What you’re used to is no longer there. The identity you’ve held for so long is no longer required. You look around and wonder what to do next and float in a sea of indecision.
This is all normal. It takes time to acclimate to a new situation. Think of it as being dropped off in a strange land where no one speaks your language. Things look similar, but everything is completely different. Learning how to communicate and figure out what you are to do and where you stand takes a moment.
It’s also a perfect time to slough off the things you don’t enjoy and reinvent yourself into something more aligned with your true self. You get to make the rules for yourself in this new world. No longer do you need to be the one who cleans up after others. No longer do you need to wrangle the team. You get to choose.
I recently had a conversation with a friend who is realizing that their partner really isn’t coming back. This was a mutual decision and with love and friendship, but my friend has been in a holding pattern…just in case. We discussed different ways of claiming the space that once was for two, but now is just for one.
Letting Go of What No Longer Serves You
How do you find out what you like after years of being in partnership (work, romantic, just friends, children)? The first suggestion I came up with is, walk around your space (mental, emotional, and/or physical) and notice what you get upset with or cringe at. It doesn’t have to be a big reaction, but there’s a negative reaction, none the less.
Why does this thing upset you?
Is it a bad memory?
Have you just never liked it, but they did?
Acknowledge it, then release it with love. You don’t have to keep it just because. Start with the little things. You will see that with every release, momentum will grow and you will start to notice more of what no longer serves and be willing to let it go. Then CELEBRATE! Those items served you once and have done their job. Allow them to go to someone else who needs the help.
Embracing What Brings You Joy
The next suggestion is, walk around your space (mental, emotional, and/or physical) and notice what you get a charge out of, what lights you up every time you notice it. Again, it doesn’t have to be a big reaction. It could be a simple smile that crosses your face.
Why does this thing enlighten you?
Is it a good memory?
What does it bring to your being?
Acknowledge it, then see where you can have more of it. If it’s physical, where can you place it so you see it more often? If it’s mental, how can you remind yourself of it more often? If it’s emotional, how can you put yourself into that state more often?
In business they say, “Do more of what works, and less of what doesn’t.” The same can be said for your life.
What works for you? Do more of that!
What doesn’t work for you? Do less of that!
Creating a Life That Aligns With Your True Self
Take note of what these things are, and you’ll start to see a pattern. When you see this pattern you can change or shift it, if needed, in the direction that works best for you.
Life transitions are an opportunity to step into your most authentic self. The key is understanding where your focus is and how to direct it toward your BIG Dream.
If you’re ready to shift gears, take back the wheel, and accelerate toward the life you truly want, download the Find Your Focus guide now. Inside, you’ll find guided prompts to help you navigate change, realign your focus, and take the next step with confidence.