Discomfort Is Not Failure, It’s a Sign You’re Growing
Oh the things that Shift-Storms™ bring!
When you’re going for something that is outside of your comfort zone, there will be discomfort…that’s the whole point. But don’t think of that discomfort as failure, it’s growth.
I recently watched the documentary Marty, Life Is Short on Netflix and there was one line that struck me,
“It’s 98% failure.”
Martin Short was talking about the entertainment business, but I think that statement can be said about life in general.
Why Discomfort Is Not Failure
When you start to change old patterns you kind of force yourself into a bit of emotional whiplash that can cause emotions to run high. You try to create new habits, then fall off the wagon. You try to react differently, but fall in the same traps.
You feel awkward, lonely, and vulnerable…maybe even a little stupid because you’re traversing new territory while feeling like you should have it all together by now.
But here’s the thing, it’s all new. You’re growing and learning and there will be mistakes made. Even Martin Short, Hollywood Star, has had his flops…and, as he says, most of his work has been box office flops! Yet we love him and think of him as a star…that he “made it” in Hollywood.
But you go out and do the thing! You learn and grow. If the thing initially flops, you try again. Until one day you find yourself as the person people look up to. You may still feel, inside, like you’re not getting anywhere or that what you’ve done isn’t important, but there are folks out there who remember you and are grateful for you and what you did for them.
Growth Feels Uncomfortable Before It Feels Natural
Discomfort and setbacks just mean you’re moving forward. They are not signs to stop. They may be signs to pause and reassess how you’re going about things, but never to stop.
This reassessment is about what’s working and what’s not. If you’re doing things all by yourself, maybe you need to bring in some help. If you find you’re avoiding certain things, maybe it’s time to change it up and lean into them.
Moving Through the Discomfort of Change
There are many paths to a destination, and you get to choose which path you take. Every BIG Dream has its own downsides, and you get to choose if it’s worth it. As Elizabeth Gilbert says in her book BIG MAGIC, “Frustration is not an interruption of your process; frustration is the process.” When you’re able to eat what she calls the ‘shit sandwich’ and ask for more, you know it’s your dream.
You have one life. It’s yours to explore and discover. You can choose to live it small and comfortable or you can stretch yourself into what you love doing and become “pig in shit” (or dog in mud) happy.
Growth rarely feels graceful while you’re in the middle of it. Most of the time it feels awkward, uncertain, vulnerable, and messy. That doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you’re stretching beyond the limits of who you used to be. The discomfort you feel while creating new habits, new reactions, and new dreams is often proof that movement is happening beneath the surface. So if life feels a little shaky right now, take a breath before deciding it’s wrong. You may simply be in the middle of becoming.
If you’re navigating your own Shift-Storms™ right now and want support learning how to move through discomfort without losing yourself in it, download the Navigating Shift-Storms™ Guide. It’ll help you better understand the emotional ups and downs that happen during growth, so you can stop interpreting discomfort as failure and start recognizing it as part of the journey.